Much like everyone else, I am a big fan of The Twilight Zone. My favorite episode has to be the one where Rod Serling spent 22 minutes playing Frogger flawlessly while various tragedies occurred in the background, but that’s a story for another CreepyPasta. Today, I’m talking about the time I first saw my favorite movie of all time, The Twilight Zone Movie.
One day, I was at a flea market, looking at various Pokemon cartridges with their labels removed. Just as I purchased what appeared to be Pokemon Yellow, something really cool caught my eye. It was a VCR for The Twilight Zone the Movie. I Naruto ran to it, grabbed it, and bought it. I already knew there was a movie, and I already loved it, but I had never actually seen it before, nor did I know what it was about. I got in my car and drove home to watch my new movie.
When I got home, I put the VCR into my VHS, turned my TV on, grabbed a bag of microwaveable popcorn, microwaved it for one minute and thirty seconds even though the bag said three minutes because the last time I microwaved popcorn for three minutes I burned my house down, poured myself a glass of fine wine, took my popcorn out of the microwave, grabbed my wine glass, walked over to my couch, bent my knees, placed my ass on my couch, put my wine glass on the table, opened my bag of popcorn, turned on my TV, rewound the VCR, and started watching the movie.
The beginning where two guys are talking about the Twilight Zone was exactly the same as I somehow already knew it was despite having never seen this movie before. It was during the first segment of the movie that things started getting weird.
One of the few things I knew about this movie is that, during filming, the helicopter on set crashed, killing the lead actor and two children. I figured I should point this out, because it’s relevant to my story.
The first segment was about a bigot being sent to Nazi Germany and living as a Jew. However, for some reason, all the Nazis had Zalgo eyes. When the bigot got sent to a Ku Klux Klan meeting as a black man, all the Klansmen were Missingno, and their lines were replaced with the Lavender Town theme played in reverse on an Otamatone. But the scariest part of this scene was when the bigot was sent to the Vietnam War as a Vietnamese soldier. This was the part of the movie that killed those people.
When it got to the helicopter scene, I looked closely to see if I could find any signs of what happened on that fateful day. Sure enough, that helicopter crashed…
…into the World Trade Center on September 11, 2001.
I couldn’t believe it. The Pokemon Yellow cartridge I bought was actually Donkey Kong Land. I had been duped. My whole life, I had wanted to play Pokemon Yellow, but now, when I thought I actually had it, it’s fucking Donkey Kong.
And that is why I am no longer a fan of Donkey Kong.